


Feels Good

by FaeAreReal



Category: Super Junior
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Mutual Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-13
Updated: 2020-08-13
Packaged: 2021-03-05 23:47:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,049
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25883845
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FaeAreReal/pseuds/FaeAreReal
Summary: Leeteuk spends a lot of time complimenting Heechul.He's the only person Heechul has met who doesn'tonlycompliment his appearance.It feels...different.
Relationships: Kim Heechul/Park Jungsoo | Leeteuk
Comments: 4
Kudos: 56





	Feels Good

**Author's Note:**

  * For [xjas](https://archiveofourown.org/users/xjas/gifts).



It starts right at debut.

Super Junior ‘05 is making their very first variety appearance. Heechul feels himself shaking in his boots, but he hides the nerves behind a mask of nonchalance. He can do this, he’s Kim _fucking_ Heechul! He has nothing to be nervous about.

The recording is going well. Heechul jokes, not enough to be obnoxious, just enough to bring in new fans. He’s got this shit in the bag. If he doesn’t have a horde of fans by the time Super Junior ‘05 makes their first comeback, something is wrong with the world.

The MC says something that Heechul misses, and before he can even turn to ask Hyu- sorry, Eunhyuk, beside him what’s been asked, Leeteuk is saying his name.  
“I think Heechul is really cool.”  
Heechul feels his eyes widen in surprise, caught off-guard by the compliment. Is that what the MC was asking?  
“Is that right?” She asks with a giggle. “Heechul is very pretty, is that why? Does he get a lot of girls?”  
Leeteuk laughs, brushing off the comment. “I mean, yes, Heechul is pretty. But, honestly, he’s just very cool. He was the first one in the whole group to memorize our choreography! He even knows other member’s parts.”  
Leeteuk pauses, and Heechul looks around to see the other members nodding in agreement. His cheeks colour, and he takes a step behind the rest, covering his face with his hands.  
“Ah,” He sighs, momentarily forgetting about the microphone clipped to the collar of his shirt. He hopes the audio editor has the sense to edit it out.  
Leeteuk looks back at him with a small smile. “I think he’s embarrassed. Sorry, Heechul-ah.”  
Heechul shakes his head, stepping back in line with the others as he feels the colour fade from his face. He doesn’t say anything, but he doesn’t think he has to. He’s known Leeteuk for years, he doesn’t have to say anything to him.  
“What about you, Heechul?” The MC asks, and Heechul forgets his momentary embarrassment in favour of turning his attention back to the show.

SM changes their name, removes the ‘05, and adds one more member.  
Kyuhyun, his name is, and he latches onto Ryeowook pretty quickly.  
Heechul is happy for them. The new kid deserves a friend. Maybe being friends with Ryeowook will toughen him up. It’s not easy being in such a large group, and Heechul imagines it’s only harder being the new guy.

They have their first comeback. The song is good, Heechul likes it. The fans like it. They go on more variety shows with it. The new kid is shy, but he’ll fit in eventually. Heechul doesn’t feel any need to worry about him.

Leeteuk continues complimenting him, both during recording and in the dorms.  
Curiously, Leeteuk doesn’t once mention his appearance. Sure, if an MC brings it up, Leeteuk will agree. But he doesn’t ever start with it. He’s always complimenting Heechul’s dancing, his jokes, his work ethic.  
It feels different.  
It feels...good.

Donghae’s father dies. He goes to the funeral. He gets in an accident.  
His leg is absolutely _fucked._ He will be able to dance, he doesn’t have to give up his dream, but it’s going to hurt.  
The pain is worth it.

Super Junior is preparing for another comeback.  
They’re in dance practice, have been here for hours already, and Heechul does something wrong. He isn’t even sure what he does wrong, his brain foggy with pain and exhaustion. Still, their dance teacher scolds him, and _fuck,_ yeah, he deserves it. He _knows_ better.  
His leg hurts, but it’s not an excuse. He shouldn’t have made the mistake he did, he should be able to remember what his mistake was, _he knows better._  
God damn, he is so tired. His leg aches. He just wants to lay down.

Their teacher exits the practice room with instruction for them to continue practicing the new choreography on their own.  
Heechul drops to the floor as soon as the door closes behind their teacher, splaying his limbs every which way. He closes his eyes. He doesn’t try to sleep, but he does tune out the members’ voices surrounding him.

Leeteuk approaches him.  
He knows it’s Leeteuk just by the other man’s footsteps. Perhaps that is odd, but he’s known Leeteuk for so long.  
He doesn’t allow himself to overthink it.

He hears Leeteuk drop down beside him, and opens his eyes.  
Leeteuk is sitting, not laying down, and Heechul moves to drag himself up to meet his gaze properly. It’s polite, and while he doesn’t particularly care about manners with most people, it’s a little different when it’s Leeteuk.  
Leeteuk, however, motions for Heechul to stay down. He points at Heechul’s obviously swollen leg, and before Heechul can reassure him that he’s fine, Leeteuk has grabbed his foot and placed it on his own knees.  
“When it’s swollen, you’re supposed to raise it above your heart, I think. Don’t you listen to your doctor, Heechul-ah?”  
Heechul nods slowly. He remembers his doctor and his physiotherapist had both said something like that. He wonders how Leeteuk knows. Did he ask their manager? Did he do his own research? His mind wanders with the possibilities. 

Leeteuk’s mouth is moving, and then it isn’t and he’s staring at Heechul with a weird look, and Heechul realizes he completely missed whatever Leeteuk just tried to say to him.  
“I’m sorry,” He says, “I didn’t catch a single word you just said.”  
Leeteuk laughs, shakes his head. “Yeah. I thought so. I was just asking if you’re feeling okay?”  
“Oh,” Heechul replies eloquently, rubbing the back of his neck. “Yeah, I’m fine. If anything, I’m kind of pissed off at myself for messing up just now. I know better than to do something stupid like that.” He sighs, hanging his head back. “Just tired, I guess.”  
Leeteuk hums, his eyes searching Heechul’s face. Heechul forces himself not to allow his cheeks to colour under Leeteuk’s watch.

“Is that really it?” Leeteuk asks. Heechul opens his mouth to ask what that’s supposed to mean, but before he can say anything, Leeteuk is pointedly looking back down at his leg, still resting on Leeteuk’s knees.  
“Don’t overwork yourself, Heechul-ah. If it still hurts a lot, we can put the comeback off for another while.”  
Heechul shakes his head fervently. It hurts like a motherfucker, he knows this and he’s pretty sure Leeteuk knows this, but they can’t put the comeback off any longer. He can’t inconvenience his group members any longer. Everyone knows that the longer rookie groups go between comebacks, the more likely they are to lose any relevance they once had.  
“It’s fine. I swear.”  
Leeteuk searches his face once more. He doesn’t look happy with what he finds, but he accepts it nonetheless. He pats Heechul’s leg once before standing up, offering a hand to help Heechul back up as well.  
“Just so you know,” Leeteuk says as he pulls Heechul up. “I think you’re one of the strongest people I know.”  
Heechul’s glad Leeteuk turns around while he speaks, because this time he can’t stop the blood rushing up to his face.

He looks in the mirror, and his leg looks perfectly normal in the reflection. He finds himself wondering how Leeteuk noticed his leg was swollen in the first place.

And then, the comeback gets pushed back anyway.  
There’s another accident. Four of his fellow members are hurt.  
He knows he should be sad about all of them, he knows that he really should be the most worried about Kyuhyun, but seeing Leeteuk with stitches all down his back causes something in Heechul’s chest to stir.  
Leeteuk should never look like that.

It’s shortly after Don’t Don promotions finish that Heechul forces himself to confront his feelings.  
He likes Leeteuk more than he likes the rest of the members. He’s tried for years to deny it, but he can’t any longer. He tries to tell himself it’s just because he and Leeteuk are the same age, but the excuse doesn’t last even a minute in his head. He knows it’s bullshit, and he’s trying _not_ to bullshit himself any longer.  
Next, he tries to tell himself that it’s just friendship.  
That excuse lasts a few weeks, until he exhausts himself trying to keep it up.  
_Fine,_ he thinks. It’s true, he has a stupid crush on stupid Leeteuk.  
(Leeteuk isn’t stupid. He’s sweet, and kind, and caring, and oh _God,_ Heechul has it bad.)

Leeteuk can never find out.

He pines.

Years pass, members leave.  
Leeteuk compliments Heechul. He’s hard working, he’s dependable, he’s fun.  
Things are hard, but Leeteuk makes him feel like everything will be okay. 

Heechul enlists, and while he’s gone, Leeteuk enlists, too.  
They don’t message often, but when they do, Leeteuk always ends the conversation with a compliment. He tells Heechul that he’s cool, he’s strong, he’s smart or he’s caring or he’s compassionate.  
He still doesn’t bring up his appearance. It’s nice.

Heechul knows that Leeteuk doesn’t think he’s ugly. If anyone else talks about Heechul’s looks, Leeteuk agrees. He’s pretty, he’s handsome, he's attractive, yes, yes, _yes._  
It’s just the fact that Leeteuk chooses everything else to tell him...still years later, when any other person would have run out of things to compliment, Leeteuk is always finding something new.  
Heechul doesn’t have the words to describe the feelings Leeteuk causes him.

He pines.

Leeteuk comes back in 2014, and Heechul feels overwhelmed, for whatever reason.  
He didn’t realize how much he missed Leeteuk until he was in front of him once again.  
Heechul tries to hide his emotions. It’s a weird combination that he’s feeling. He’s happy, of course, but he also feels relief. He feels like a weight has been taken from his shoulders, one that he didn’t know he had been carrying for as long as Leeteuk had been gone.  
Somehow, he thinks Leeteuk knows.

He waits until the other members are gone before he approaches Leeteuk after Mamacita dance practice one night.  
“I brought you a gift.” He says, handing Leeteuk a small wrapped present. “I wrapped it like shit, I’m not very good at wrapping stuff, but I didn’t think you would mind.”  
Leeteuk laughs, taking the present from Heechul’s hands. “I don’t mind,” He confirms.  
Heechul nods. “Okay.” He looks in Leeteuk’s eyes, but it feels like too much too soon, and his gaze quickly darts back to his hands. “I’m really happy you’re back, Leeteukie.”  
Leeteuk hums, and Heechul drags his eyes back up.  
“Me too,” Leeteuk replies. “It’s nice to see you again, Heechul-ah. Thank you for the gift, I’m sure I’ll love it, whatever it is. You’re good at gift-giving, you always have been.”

Devil is a good song.  
It’s catchy, and the choreography is fun.  
The fans like it, and they go on a few variety shows, and for some reason, it feels like Leeteuk is complimenting him even more than he was before.  
“To be honest,” Leeteuk is telling an MC. “We all know Heechul struggles with his leg. It hurts him a lot, even if sometimes he doesn’t want us to know.”  
Heechul wants to curse, but all the members are agreeing with him, and besides, he’s on TV. He watches closely as Leeteuk continues.  
“I don’t know how he does it. Goes on stage with us every day in as much pain as he is. I couldn’t do it.”  
It’s not a new sentiment from Leeteuk. He’s said similar things before, but always in private. The other members have never even heard Leeteuk tell Heechul these things. And now, here he is, saying it on television for fans and non-fans alike to hear.

Maybe he should be embarrassed, but it makes Heechul’s heart swell.  
He doesn’t know how much longer he can last with this pining.  
Sometimes, he feels like Leeteuk is going to make his heart explode, overflowing with emotion.  
“Stop it,” He mutters, embarrassed, with a playful shove to Leeteuk’s side.  
Leeteuk laughs (Heechul loves his laugh), and nods. “Alright, alright. Sorry.”

Donghae, of all people, is the one who confronts him.  
Donghae is on a vacation from the military, one of his last before he’s discharged, and he’s chosen to use it to visit Heechul.  
Heechul was happy about it, until the conversation led to places he would rather not talk about. Especially not with a fellow Super Junior member.

“You should tell him.”  
Heechul feels his heart jump to his throat, but he plays dumb. “Who? I have no idea what you’re talking about.”  
Donghae sighs into his drink. “Yes you do! He likes you too, we all know it, you should just confess.”  
Heechul files the implication that the entire rest of Super Junior talks about his love life (and apparently, Leeteuk’s too) without him into a part of his memory to be examined later, and lets out a hearty laugh. “You’re drunk, Donghae. You have no idea what you’re talking about.”  
“I’m not drunk!” Donghae whines. “I’ve only had two beers.”  
Heechul pulls the bottle away from Donghae’s grasp. “Yeah, two. And we both know your limit is one. C’mon, you can sleep on my couch tonight.”  
Donghae puts up a fight, but when Heechul leaves to grab a blanket and spare pillow for him, he returns to see Donghae’s eyes fluttering closed where he lays.  
Fucking lightweight.

He can’t forget what Donghae said.  
It’s been a couple weeks now, but Heechul thinks about it every night as he lays in bed and finds it impossible to fall asleep.  
The other members think that Leeteuk likes him.  
Does he?  
Do the compliments mean something more than simply building Heechul’s confidence? It’s true that Leeteuk doesn’t compliment the other members the way he does Heechul, but the other members didn’t get reduced to their appearance the way Heechul did, back in the early days. What if that’s all it is, a habit that Leeteuk never bothered to break?  
He doesn’t want to think about it, doesn’t want to get his hopes up just to have his heart broken.

He pines.

Until he doesn’t anymore.  
Leeteuk pulls him aside one day, while they’re preparing for Black Suit promotions.  
Heechul has already decided that he will not dance the entire song, simply joining for the final verse and chorus as he had done before. He doesn’t think his leg can take any more than that.  
He feels bad for letting the group down, especially after they’ve gone so long without a comeback.

This is what he thinks Leeteuk is pulling him aside for, at first. He doesn’t expect Leeteuk to scold him for it, he knows that Leeteuk understands the situation and even though he may be disappointed by the circumstances, he would never be mad at Heechul for it. Perhaps, Heechul thinks, Leeteuk is simply pulling him aside to tell him once again that it is okay to ask them for a break when his leg is bothering him too badly.  
He’s proven wrong pretty quickly, however.

“Heechul,” Leeteuk says. “Let’s go somewhere that the others won’t listen in.”  
He hears groans on the other side of the door, and holds back a snicker. Of course they would be listening. He shouldn’t be expecting anything else at this point.  
Leeteuk leads him down a quiet hallway, and Heechul follows obediently. The building is quiet in the late hour, so he doesn’t understand why they have to go so far, but he doesn’t question. Leeteuk knows what he’s doing.  
When they finally stop, Heechul has followed Leeteuk into one of the sound-proof vocal practice rooms.  
Heechul raises an eyebrow. “What’s going on?” He asks, sitting on an uncomfortable chair and stretching out his leg.  
Leeteuk watches him carefully. “Does your leg hurt?”  
“No,” He replies. “Well, no more than usual. Is something wrong?” He knows Leeteuk wouldn’t take him all the way here just to ask about his leg, and as much as he respects and cares about Leeteuk, he hates beating around the bush. If there’s bad news, he would rather hear it straight.  
Leeteuk shakes his head. Then he stops, seemingly reconsidering. “I guess it depends on your point of view. I don’t think it’s bad? And I don’t think you’ll think it’s bad…”  
Heechul nods, assured. Leeteuk knows him well, if he says it’s not bad, then it’s not bad. “Lay it on me,” He says, stretching his arms wide.  
Leeteuk pauses.  
“I didn’t think this far,” He admits, rubbing the back of his neck. “Give me a second.”  
Heechul nods, pulling out his phone and scrolling through SNS.

He’s liking a picture on Instagram when Leeteuk blurts out, “I like you.”  
His head snaps up, and he nearly drops his phone from the shock.  
“You what?”  
Leeteuk squeezes his eyes shut. “I like you,” He repeats.  
“I’m sorry if this makes things awkward. I just - It’s been years now, and I had to get it out there, and Donghae seems to think you like me too? And I figured, you’re probably the last person to make it weird, right? Because you’re so endearing, you must get confessions from people every day, so you would know how to handle it, right? A-”  
“Teukie,” Heechul interrupts, standing up and grasping Leeteuk’s hands in his own. “I like you too. Okay? You don’t have to be nervous.”  
Leeteuk looks at their hands, and then hesitantly at Heechul’s face. “You do?”  
Heechul lets out a small laugh. “Of course I do. You make it pretty hard not to. Jesus, Leeteukie, I’ve liked you since Don’t Don. Maybe even earlier than that.”

Leeteuk heaves a deep sigh, resting his head on Heechul’s shoulder. “You should’ve told me earlier, idiot! Why didn’t you say anything? We could’ve gone through this years ago.”  
“Yeah?” Heechul teases, “Then why didn’t you say anything?”  
Leeteuk steps back, levelling Heechul with a glare that just makes him smile. “Fine. I get it.”  
His smile widens. “Hey, Teukie. What do you say to being my boyfriend?”  
For once, finally, Leeteuk is the one whose cheeks colour, and Heechul revels in the sight of it.  
“Yes, obviously, you idiot,” Leeteuk mutters.

It feels good.

**Author's Note:**

> hiii everyone so full disclosure: any variety show "quotes" are 100% made up because i dont...feel like watching a million variety shows to find real quotes lmfao  
> also! its fanfiction so i just took artistic liberties so if theres anything u dont quite remember suju ever talking about or perhaps i fucked up the timeline of events or something we can just say its one of those fun little artistic liberties  
> anywho!! this is based off [this tweet](https://twitter.com/xjaspeared/status/1293832284001505280?s=20) woooo  
> i havent written rpf in a hot minute and if i remember correctly this is the first suju fic ive ever written? so pls be kind...im sorry if its ooc!  
> with all that being said, thanks for reading and i hope u enjoyed it!!


End file.
